Perhaps aging New England Patriot’s quarterback Tom Brady is pondering other careers since his four-game suspension recently got reinstated by the NFL for the tiresome how-are-we-still-talking-about-this “deflategate” scandal. The 38-year-old athlete has launched the website TB12Sports.com and it is reminiscent of Gwyneth Paltrow’s goop website in all the most ridiculous ways.
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If no one wanted to high-five Brady before, him selling a $200 cookbook isn’t going to change things.
Similar to how women flock to goop for Paltrow’s diet secrets, Brady’s site aims for people who want to eat and train like the famous quarterback. Brady’s overpriced “nutrition manual” contains “89 seasonally inspired” healthy, muscle-building recipes. Brady posted a picture preview of the expensive cookbook on his Facebook page, claiming it will help others “achieve peak performance levels.”
Does avocado ice cream sound good? Apparently, it does. The Ugg model’s “nutrition manual” sold out in one day. Maybe these buyers are the same people who are down to purchase Gwyneth’s $345 cast-iron cocotte.
Brady founded the TB12 website with body coach Alex Guerrero to help get athletes into the best shape of their lives by pitching their “method and philosophy to active individuals” and “performance longevity in a holistic and prevention-oriented way,” which kind of sounds like the “conscious uncoupling” of working out and dieting.
Brady’s can of protein powder retails for $54.
A weighted vest is sold for $140, a medicine ball of $90 and a shoulder performance kit (a what?), sells for $160. The site also encourages people to sign up for BrainHQ, “a science to believe in” which creates personalized work-outs for — you guessed it! — your brain. These cognitive exercises will apparently “make the most of your unique brain” by making it “faster” and “sharper.”
Sounds like Brady has been drinking Paltrow’s Kool-Aid. Which probably costs $75 and is made with specks of real gold and organic matcha tea.
